there are some nights when i get into a zen mood. i put on some fun tunes, think about life, and feel like blogging. these are the moments i contemplate those i love, those i wish to love, things i could do without, and thoughts of the future. these are also the moments i think about you, dad.
you see, i miss my dad. i miss so many things about him. his smile, his advice, his opinions. his drive, dedication, wit, work ethic, and motivation. his emails, phone calls, frustrations, loves, distastes, and his face. his ability to make me feel successful. his strength.
i have a lot of qualities from my dad, and for that i am very grateful. now if i could just find a guy like him (right mom!?). hes watching over me...this much i know.
i think he is my north star. and for all my fears (rational or not), i truly feel safe when i think about him. i wish he was here. i dont understand. i want to raise money to cure CJD. i want him back. mom and i are strong as steel, but he should be here. i wonder what they have him doing up there?? :)
soo, hi dad! hi god! hi everybody that is friends with my dad!! i hope you guys are having a ball...and enjoying all the ridiculous things i do. or dont do. or say. or...well, i think you get it.
...and hey, mom: i love you. i mean, i really really love you. thank you for being you. thank you for being my bestie. thank you for being on the other end of the phone call....every time. thank you for my other half of genes. the kelley girls :) mmm, such a nice ring to it, no?! i love you!!
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