Saturday, December 31, 2011

hello from midtown

ehh i know the quality isnt great but thats my view tonight. well, every night really. in the 3 months i have lived here there has only been one night i closed my blinds and it was on my birthday. i got home at 5am and thought closing them would keep out the sun. im pretty sure at 5am nothing matters. i slept fine.

well, were entering the new year and i have a new crush!  there always has to be one (really, five) right?!? ;) happy new year!

hello 2012!!

a few of my last posts have been posted out of order. getting back into this blogging thing left me so excited i started about 3 posts and forgot to post them!

here we are. new years eve! this is as good an opportunity as any to once again appreciate where i live, my friends and family. i live about 5 blocks from times square. i walk by it on my way to work and glance up at the big ball thats going to drop tonight (which, by the way, is super small, but shh i wont kill the dream) and that seems insane. as a kid i fondly remember visiting this place and being amazed by all the lights, the noise, the movement. now that i live here its sometimes hard not to get annoyed with the tourists, traffic and lack of privacy.

im thrilled about starting a new year. 2011 was a good one and i hope for more of the same in 2012. i dont really make outlandish resolutions, i will exercise 5 hours everyday! i will dress to the nines everyday! i will only eat kale! i wont be obsessed with boys! so i just want health and happiness to those that i love.

i couldnt anything better than going for a run wearing shorts SHORTS!! december 31st. please god, let this be a foreshadowing of what is going to be a mild winter. haha that picture is ridiculous, i know. but i think my blog lacks pictures and lacks amusement so im attempting to post pictures (regardless of how silly or imperfect) to help tell my stories. i really am going to wear that running and im ok with that.

im off to impress those walking on park avenue. im pretty sure they will be coveting this entire outfit after i pass them. "dear, i must have that! she looks stunning!"


i am hoping to start my christmas day in a way i think would make my dad very proud, not to mention Jesus...starbucks. (theres no way these guys can have a time off right...right?!).

edited to add: starbucks is NOT OPEN on christmas day. i was not happy for, i think im addicted, but i was happy for those that work at starbucks...i guess its not run by overly caffenated nazi's. who knew??!

this AM we are heading to hospice to volunteer to serve christmas dinner. with the candlelight church service last night, hospice today and way WAY too much candy being eaten i am on the verge of tears, but im holding it together. something about crying with strangers screams WEIRDO and i am not about to do that.

yesterday mom and i went to king of prussia to do a bit of for-fun shopping. despite everyones attempts as wooing us away (itll be crazy! wow youre nuts! why would you do that!) we had a ball. i wont lie, i thought everyone would be right...that it would have been a madhouse, but it wasnt bad.

i almost cheated.

i debated starting a new blog. i was looking to start fresh and thought i wanted a clean blog to do it with, but then i thought why? my life is messy and it has a past so if people read back on the past few years thats ok.

so im back from christmas break. it was lovely to be home :) while i cant live there quite yet, there is something so safe and happy about being home. i guess thats why its home :)

this year helping out with christmas dinner at hospice was super difficult. the moment we arrived i had a raging headache. i felt heavy and oddly sad. while food was heating up in the ovens i ventured down the hall to my dads room. i stood by the door to look in (i didnt want to go in since someone was in there) and just stood still. memories of those 7 days came flashing back to me. i stood there outside the very room where i lost my dad. i thought i had gotten to a place where i could be ok with all those memories, but i dont think that will ever be true. after a few minutes i walked back toward the kitchen as mom was walking toward me. i broke down as she hugged me so tight.

"mom, i need a minute. i didnt know this was going to happen"
"hil, take all the time. i am so proud of you"

even writing this is tough. i cant imagine fighting this battle with anyone other than my mom. she is so supportive of those mini breakdowns and i am so thankful for her. i helped a bit longer and ran home. my head was so heavy and hurt from holding back so much emotion that i knew a run was the only thing  that could help me. i cranked up my headphones to a pretty deafening level and ran home. it wasnt super long, about 30-40 minutes or so, but man, it felt good.

ok, on to happier things :)...

say hi to buddy!!

we are dog sitting this week. pramila's cousin couldnt take the dog to chicago so he's with us. his name is buddy and he is some sort of mixed, you can probably help me with this. its SO fun having a little guy here to take care of. it wouldnt be the kind id choose for myself, but thats ok. i will admit the 10 degree weather we had the other day did not make for a happy hilary walking him but thats ok. something about me learning to dress appropriately for winter will help im sure :)

Sunday, December 4, 2011

hello bloggie!!!

wow. it is december 4th my friends and i have severely neglected my blog.

so much has been going on in the past 6 weeks. i moved. i ran a mud run. ive been on a million dates. i think ive slept a total of 10 hours. ive had a lot of wine. i have fallen in love with 56040845 boys. ive dyed my hair dark then light then back to dark again. ive laughed...a lot. ive kissed a few frogs, and seen a few celebs.

i now live in hells kitchen with 3 friends. its a great pad...were having a lot of fun.

more updates to come i promise...this was just a teaser.