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Showing posts from April, 2010

i blame my hormones

i cant quench my hunger for chocolate! 2 chocolate drizzled pita sandwiches, chocolate covered pretzles, a chocolate protein bar, countless nips candies and so on. yum yum! i think im hormonal. that and work has been sucking like crazy. (i swear i had real meals today too...those were just some chocolatey extras!), ps, the boy!? he sucks. im over it. thank you, that is all :)

haha! happy thursday. this little chub is going to continue drowning her emotions in chocolate. yea, its healthy. its getting me through this week. bye bye!

confessions of a blogger

i still love the backstreet boys. they just came out with a new album, and i love it.

i am in love. at least in hilary world. hes a lucky SOB isnt he?! haha, just kidding.

i am having a ball creating a life here in LA. its so great meeting good people. makes it all worth it when you seem to meet a lot of not-so-good people (nicest way to say it).

i like to hike in the middle on nowhere with great people. the best adventures always happen that way.

i want my dad back.

i saw the hugest penis today from a tiny little bishon. he was dry humping a  lab, and it was huge. we all joked that he had the dick of a black man (please excuse the language). it was the funniest thing i have ever seen. took 20 minutes just to go back in. too much information, i know, but this was truly the most hilariously, amazingly ridiculous thing i have seen in a long time! OMG! wish we had taken a picture.

i love bbq-ing with friends. i have high hopes for the summer :)

really wants this boy to work out. (he has …

signs it wasnt you - it was him

* having sunday lunch at your mothres house, when asked if he wanted custard or cream with his dessert, he threw his napkin in the air and cried, "i dont know! i have to make that sort of commitment now?! stop crowding me. i cant breathe. i cant breathe. GIVE ME AIR!"

* he changed his facebook status to single because the eggs you boiled for his breakfast-in-bed treat were too rubbery and the bacon wasnt crispy enough

* he forgot your birthday. even though its the same day as jesus's. which is christmas day. noone forgets.

* you bought his a mug with "hot stuff" on it. he bought you a mug with "mug" on it.

* you 'made love' to him. he 'nailed' you. (ha, gross).

* he used your new iphone as a coaster for his beer (um, idiot?!)

* he kept cracking "jokes" about threesomes when he first met your friends.


mind you, i find these utterly hilarious, and quite frankly, absurd. however, delightfully entertaining.

10 things to say to your mom (after happy mothers day, of course)

in honor of mothers day coming up in about 3 weeks, i thought this post was appropriate:

1. thanks for the orthodontia

2. the card is in the mail. sorry its late, and yes, im still a procrastinator in spite of everything you did to help with that

3. sure, i cried every morning at day care, but im so proud of your career

4. the clothes you wore in the eighties - where are they? and dont be hurt when i call them vintage

5. my sex life is satisfying and safe, and you dont need details

6. im moving back in! haha, just kidding

7.  the crazy rules i fought at age 16? thanks for sticking by them

8. ...oh, and a general apology for that whole year. ok, decade

9. its all your fault i just spent $100 on organizing bins at the container store

10. and hey, mom, hows your crazy week going?


mom, i love you so much. you deserve more than one day a year. thank you for being my mom. i am such a lucky, lucky girl. xoxo

hey, its ok!

...for your "secret ingredient" to be ketchup

...that you have a posh phone voice

..to still be obsessed with lightning bugs aged 30

...for facebook de-tagging to take priority over, oh, everything

...if you dont always return clothes to the rail you picked them up from

...to google yourself. and be a bit dissapointed

...to go to the gym only to sit gossiping in the sauna. your pores are now immaculate

...for your wardrobe to have an identity crisis in this weird "is it winter or is it spring" weather confusion

...to have sex that only lasts as long as the ad break

hey, its ok!

...to spend twice as much for the coca-cola in the little old-fashioned bottle.

...to consider driving with the windows down an effective hair-drying method.

...to actually use the coupons your mom sends you.

...to take great pleasure in telling guys to "man up." (because we women? we "up" everday).

...to secretly care if your name comes first in the CC list on a group email. not that it matters, right? right?!

...to to bummed its almost toenail maintenance season. (not me! i loooove pedicures!!!!)

...to never really know what to do with a name tag. if youre wearing strapless, does it go on your skin?

...to like fruit after a meal but be clear that its not dessert. pie is dessert. cake is dessert. kiwis are not.

hi bloggies!

its been a while since i blogged. while i absolutely loooooove to blog, life has gotten a bit in the way. please excuse this somewhat wallowing, sad, frustrated and blah post. i just seem to have hitten that proverbial wall.
after spending 12 straight days in the office (yes, easter sunday was spent at work), i am feeling a bit low. life has been feeling especially heavy lately. just seems i am doing an awful lot of struggling and not getting anywhere.

ok ok enough of this. i want to post something happy. i think its time for "hey, its ok!"

happy april fools day!

it totally has nothing to do with my post, but i wanted to wish you all a very happy day filled with pranks :)

so, its back to reality. mom came and went. of course it was the fastest 3 days ever. we literally apartment hopped, ate, drank and surfed our way throughout the state. if its true what they say about "you are what you eat" then i am most definitely frozen yogurt, candy, grilled cheese and pizza. i know dad, i know! but, it was a treat weekend...hehe. we did eat a lot of salads and baked potatoes, berries (and cool whip) too, so there was somewhat of a balance. ha!
it was such fun going around to different places to see if mom could see herself living in them.
correction: it.was.horrendous

we started off the way i initially did when i came to LA: apartment complexes. i wont bad mouth them on the whole, as i know they are fabulous for a lot of people. but they arent for the kelleys it seems. moving on...

we hit marina del ray, newport beach, balboa island, laguna bea…