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Showing posts from March, 2011

bestest birthday week

hApPy bIrThdAy b!!!!!!

while it started this past weekend, we are celebrating the life of my bestest this whole week.
ill start by saying it was the most awesome weekend.

a few of the highlights:

I fell in love. oh, like your surprised. ha!

no really, I did.

Arizona WON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I won a backrub and $2. it was a BIG deal.

I don’t know how to sleep anymore.

we lived on chips and guac, cake and ice cream, butter and biscuits, pizza, wings, beer and french fries this weekend. nope, don’t feel bad. fatter, but not bad.

we went to the comedy cellar and have never laughed so hard and had so much fun…the headliner was colin quinn. he was by far the worst comic, which tells you how great the rest were.

we had a brunch for around 14 people…when it came time to sing ali happy birthday, the next tables over joined our fun. were fun people

I shared my cake spoon with a cute boy.

im now obsessed with hint-of-lime tortilla chips. they are crack in chip form. right, ali?? ha!

I gave myself a hair trim. ha…
its monday baby!
i was pretty much in and out of the apt yesterday, but caughts snippets of the newest season of the real world on mtv. (ps, anyone else think this is the most ironic name for this show? should be called "spring break". or "drunken hook up". or just plain "sex and alcohol" or "std giveaway"). anyway, i digress. they showed one of the roommates having a tender moment regarding how he was going to tell him roommates hes on a show called "fratpad" where dudes live together and are pretty much naked and do crazy things, have sex and who knows what else. he emphasizes that he isnt gay.

my confusion here is this: how are you that cool with all that stuff when you arent gay? i have a ton of guy friends (both gay and straight) and none of the straight guys would just chill with each other naked. or touch each other with their shirts off. or have sex with each other for entertainment. or videotape it for youtube.

um yea. google…

because its friday...

from the lovely ladies at Glamour, here are 12 things every woman deserved in life:

1. a statement bag, even if the statement is "who cares about statement bags"

2. more than one square foot of space on any form of public transportation (umm, id suggest never moving to nyc then. this just doesnt exist. and if you try to gain personal space someone will push you, yell at you or flat out punch you. ok, maybe not actually punch you. but probably)

3. fresh flowers once a week. self-picked dandelions count. (remember when you were little and you rubbed dandelions on your face? no? only i did that? ohh, ok)

4. a say in whether and when you become a mother. (if im ready now, does the boy have to say yes?)

5. love you can feel, even from 1000 miles away. (or 3000. ha)

6. a few days filled with flip-flops, tropical sunsets and the sound of steel drums. (or, if youre a kelley, wear sandals and shorts all year round)

7. a teen mom marathon the day youre home with a fever (i can think of  a mi…
hello there folks.
its thursday (thank god) and this shit-tastic weather outside better clear up by the time i head home, cause i didnt bring an umbrella-ella-ella with me today. awesome :)

...but im told that its supposed to be like end-of-the-world monsooning all night. fabulous. im going to get drenched. cool. nothing i like more than being shoved on the subway after a long day at work, then doing all of that WET. with other wet people.

as a side note, i filed my taxes all by myself this year. WOOO! high-five for being an adult. and if i avoid jail, even better (hoping i filed correctly, etc). i feel pretty smart and accomplished about it, i wont lie. literally, all by myself. go me. (you can make fun of me, thats fine. its the little things that get me excited). haha!

also, today marks the 1 month anniversary of my job. more on that later.

RIP mr dewey. yesterday morning one of my best friends lost his dad to pancreatic cancer. he fought a good fight, but ultiamtely joined my da…

if you ever meet him...RUN!

I worked at the Corporate HQ for American Apparel in the fall of '09 to the fall of '10.
The company CEO is Dov Charney and he is infamous for being a skeeze. I could share thousands of horror stories that I personally experienced, as well as thousands more from people I know.
Here is the most recent lawsuit pending against him:
(why is he not in jail yet???)

American Apparel CEO Hit With $260M Sex Suit

By Dan Rivoli
Law360, New York (March 8, 2011) -- American Apparel Inc. founder and CEO Dov


Charney was hit with a $260 million suit on Friday from a former employee that reportedly
claimed Charney forced her to perform sexual acts on him for eight months.
Irene Morales, a 20-year-old who worked in an American Apparel store, filed the suit in the
Supreme Court of the State of New York, County of Kings, accusing Charney of holding her
prisoner in his Manhattan apartment and forcing her to have sex with him, according to
published reports.

Morales met Charney in August 2007 while she was…

a few confessions

the beibs shouldnt have cut his hair. major fail.
(is this going to be felicity part 2?!)

charlie sheen is cool. i dont care if you dont agree. i think hes all manic, all crazy, and all hilarious. the fact that he sleeps with strippers, has no teeth, takes drugs and drinks a shit ton doesnt matter to you and me.
we dont plan to marry him, let him meet our mom, or be our kids father. he is on a tv show to make us laugh.

i may or may not have a crush on someone. ok i may.

i will never again go on a blind date. having a friend set you up is not a blind date. setting yourself up is.

im not sure i will ever be comfortable seeing throngs of  naked women in the locker room of gyms. thats private stuff sistahs, why are you letting it all hang out for strangers? without going in to too much detail, it is fascinating to see the different ways women prune themselves (or not). hey, im forced to see it, i have to share my thoughts.

i will never outgrow my love for the backstreet boys.

depspite rea…

funniest item of the day.

mom, this is for you.

i was planning a presentation with a coworker of mine for total cereal.
their team is coming in to see what we have put together, as well as show us some stuff.

long story short, my coworker (andrew) was like, i wonder if theyd care if we called it totes.
"totes cereal. its totes delicious"

without hesitation, i declared it genius. pure, marketing genius. i was like "its a shoe-in to grab the younger audience and make it cool. total cereal would be so hip"

granted, that WILL NOT be the real marketing campagin we present to them.
but i think its pretty fabulous! watch this space in case it happens. hahaha! you heard it here first.

i love ny.

you know whats funny? i have come to love sex and the city so much more now that i live here. granted, i agree with tim in that, life is NOTHING like that. literally...nothing like it at all. how in the world does a freelance writer buy manolos all the time?! or how do all 4 girls get to eat lunch with each other every day?! yea, exactly. not real. what i love is the absurdity of it all. but its kinda true, it certainly skews what people think is attainable/real/cool, etc. real is way cooler. but thats why its a tv show, right?!

i officially declare myself a bicoastal lifer. i have love for both coasts, and people i adore and couldnt live without on both.
i prefer shorts to pants, but have rediscovered the thrill of winter. i still hate winter coats but love the feel of new york. there is an energy and magic here that make you feel alive, and enough crazy here to make you feel normal.

so, here we are again, monday. lets dance.
on friday, its time to partayyyyyy.
or, relax after a long week at work. whichever works.

i am absolutely ravenous today. i blame mrs. you know what.
i literally havent stopped eating since i got up this morning. haha.

anyyway. its friday. im looking forward to a pretty low-key, yet very busy, weekend.
i have a lot to do, but looking forward to packing my days doing it.
its tough to get too much shit done M-F with a full time job...so between socializing and going out,
i have to use the weekend to be an adult and grocery shop, clean, pay bills and run (god, i hope i run this weekend). i dont log that much sleep during the week due to all thats going on, so id like to get more than 5 hours of sleep too. yea yea yea.

cheers to a fun weekend! now, if i could only find me some of that charlie sheen drug...
hiiii bloggies.
the other day i received a notice that both email and blog were down. not only that, but my blog was deleted from the web. i freaked!!!!!! FREAKED! (cue spaz jokes here)

annnnyway, after a shit show of me desperately trying to figure it out (no thanks to google, who has NO customer service. yea, wtf?! isnt that illegal nowadays??), we are back!! after my initial panic reaction to reading googles help page of this particular issue telling me its common with instances of copyright infringement, web harrasment or other horrible things, i racked my brain trying to come to terms with how i did this.

well, rest assured i didnt. were back. google had a minor meltdown.

thank GOD its thursday.
thank GOD.
dont have a real reason to be super dramatic...just kinda felt like it for a second.

did i tell you all about my blind date last saturday night?? yea. thats for another time...it was A.B.S.U.R.D
he was sweet and seemed fine...our conversation was crazy. no knock on him, serio…