can you believe its already july 2nd?!

i mean really, time freakin flies. already july 4th weekend...craziness. anyone doing anything fun/exciting/different/lazy?! hopefully all :) i know my dad will be up there having a hot dog :)

another thing i cant believe...the SF half marathon is right around the corner. it feels like so long ago that we talked about doing this. its going to be so great to meet up with gamma jane and aunt martha and kelley and her friend katie (who i email with about all sorts of stuff) and hang out, check out the city, etc. i think were going to a cute italian restaurant saturday night just to all be together, and the race is early AM on sunday. drew will be flying home to b-dub on monday, while i am flying to LA where i will be crashing with craig dewey for the week while i check out some apartment complexes and hopefully have some job interviews. craaaazy!?!?

i am moving back out west. its so funny cause i feel like ive been crying wolf in terms of me moving and working and living. i think a lot of it comes down to my life just being at a really confusing stage, and im still healing and recovering from the biggest loss of my life. i think i felt the need to make a drastic change, and do something different. thats where new york came into play. i wanted to make that work...i really did. but i just dont see myself living in nyc. its a place i swore to myself long ago that was a great one to visit, but id never want to live there. after making a trip to see apartments and spend the day there, i never felt that ring more true.

i love the sun, i love the casualness of the west coast. i will miss my mom more than i can take the time to write. i will miss trips to nyc to see some of my greatest friends. but i have a lot of things in cali...i have some great buds, and i hope to make more. i mean, i have friends who cant wait to have me crash. im already planning nights out.

its a long move...i get that. and maybe totally, i dont. but you know what. im such a planner. im so prepared. im smart, i work hard, and i have my shit together. i lost my dad and my life got rocked. so, im going to try to learn to ease up on myself a little. i have no answers, and really no plan on what is going to happen these next 6 months. and im going to let myself figure it out along the way. while im doing a lot of prep work and am doing research, life is still going to be interesting to say the least.

ill keep these updates coming, cause theres lots more to share and it feels like i havent blogged in ages. but im trying to job/apt/life hunt too, and i get a bit obsessive about it, so i gotta split my time. but first im going to go get something to eat and watch a little tv, catch up on some of my fave blogs.

with my dad here all these decisions would be better. not easier, just better. he was my life barometer, and always wanted to lend a hand, a voice, an opinion. i am severely weakened by his loss, and feel desperate without him sometimes. but i want to make him proud, and do my best. i seem to be following the path of my parents...first uofa and now los angeles (neither on purpose). so thats gotta be a good omen!!! haha.

ok, more later :)