its good enough

my life, that is. i feel like so often i am trying to move on to the next thing, because anything other than what i am currently doing is "cooler" or something. but, you know what, ive decided my life is good enough for me right now. i am working with my mom which i am obsessed with, i get to hang with friends and hang with my mom, do fashion shoots and magazine ads, write my book and try out a shot with a modeling agency. i am working my ass off and loving it. i am not stuck in an office all day, but i pay all my bills and am making my way in the world. sometimes my life is crazy chaotic, sometimes pretty low key and lazy. but its all mine. i earned it, and i am continuing to try my best at lots of different things.

my life is mine. its definitely cool enough for me, wild enough for me, and interesting enough for me. and, really, who cares if the rest of the world doesnt think its any of those things. right now, at this moment, i am content with things. yea, eventually ill get a better paying job (or, maybe, azura will do so well, we will get raises), and maybe earn enough money to buy some really great things (yes, helllllllo land rover), but right now things are evening out. i am getting through some pretty tough shit, and i am proud of myself. my mom and i are fucking working it...simple as that. without her by my side, i dont know that id be the same, at least not yet.

i afford myself a pretty kick ass apartment, summer is upon us (or at least spring!!) and i get to see my friends and brother when i want to, go to KOP with my mom, and visit all my dads stomping grounds, hospice, his "site" and all things familiar. its good for me right now. so, i think its time i took the pressure off myself to do more, be more, go somewhere else, and save the world. im enough, this is enough (for now). i have no idea what the future holds, but the present is a fun place to be!