is there something in the water?

my god. i cant shake the feeling thats been plaguing me for about 2 weeks now. there just seems to be this heaviness and sadness that wont go away. feb 8th marks the 4th anniversary of my dad's passing and this time every year things just all become a shade of gray.

my best friend sent me the greatest text last night after our long chat.
"have a good night and stop worrying. you are wonderful and so strong. love you"

ali has always had the ability to make it better, whatever "it" is. she has a calming effect on me. its kinda fun knowing ill never have to pay for a therapist since i have the most awesome bff alive. granted, i might have to start paying her, but that would be money well spent.

im trying really hard to overcomensate for what i have lost, but sometimes it just hits me harder that what i am able to counterbalance. sometimes when you are in a weakened state everything gets magnified and you just feel worse.

so thanks flickey for keeping me grounded. youre priceless and i love you. xoxo