la la la

dont you just hate it when you see pictures youve taken and they dont seem nearly as cute as you thought they did in your head. god, i hate that.

*anyway, random rant now out of the way. moving on...

there are days where i feel like i have "it" figured out. i have ideas about where i want to work, live and do. i strongly believe that its not really where you are, but with who, or why. i learned a long time ago (college) that you will keep in touch with the people you choose to despite distance. flick and i are still best friends and have conquered all sorts of distance, etc. i have the same core best friends from HS...and over the holidays we all hung out so often, and it was amazing. nothing seemed to change. the guys and the girls.

that said, i am entering a new phase of my life where i am thinking about my future. maybe marriage, maybe kids. and that means sacrificing things. like maybe moving/uprooting soon. starting over in a new city. why cant life be easy (just this once) and what i feel be completely reciprocated by said boy.

for the better part of my life i have been completely boy crazy. quite frankly i still am...and i hope i never lose part of that...the fun, easy-going feeling that i can flirt with people (casually, of course). but now, i have met someone who in my own way, have fallen for. for the first time in my life (at least in the most recent years), i see something with him. i mean, i totally see it. a future, settling down, building a life. WOW! this is not a phase for me, im not seeing this as a fling. these feelings are different. "we" are different. what happens if he doesnt feel the same?

(to be i totally need to talk to this boy about his intentions.....)


what u said is absolutely true, i hate being far from my family, but facebook, cellphones email etc has made it soooo much easier in the last few yrs. plus is makes getting together that much more special.

life is about being flexible, making changes and sacrifices for the "bigger" picture,...and as u know its not always easy or fun in the process, but the long run is worth it...i wish u could convince him to come to the east coast, maybe SC even?! hehehe

whatever u decide to do, follow your heart/gut...just make sure everyone is on the same page! and of course remember, everyone on the east coast here will miss you soo soo much, but we'll always just be a mouse click or a phone # away!

love you so much hilary.

ps, drew wanted me to add "just use your head" haha typical guy!
love you hilary